oh..
spent my most unproductive weekend this week..
I JUS COULDNT CONCENTRATE!!!!

whenever i sit down my mind will WANDER

WANDER

*sing
~i love to go a-wandering..
along the mountain track..
and as i go i love to sing..
my knapsack on my back..
..valderie..
valdera..
valderaa..
valdera-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-val..derie..
valderaa..
...
crazy la

watched hulk
jus HAD to watch hulk..
i like these kind of sci fi shows..
but not too hardcore..
plus its from the cartoon..
tmr BIO TEST 2 GIGANTIC HULKING chapters..

and i cant control my mind
to READ...

oh..
plus the chem i think i understand but always cannot do...

y am i in such a messs...
------------------------------------------------------------------

15 aug today

start of a new timetable..
supposed to be shorter..
i hope..


oh ya..
sm1 called me on sunday..
some doctor..
ask me if i think i can make to uni or will i jus be goin to some poly
like wad the hell
i say if i study now i might still have a chance..
she say i might have a chance to get a scholarship to study music abroad..
provided i get past the interview some professor yu is conducting..
he was one of the judges from tat competition i joined in june tat one..
anyway the "doctor" asked me if how i will see myself in 20 years time..

so i said..dunno..older?
nola i didnt say that
coz i said wad u mean
she say like..gettin ur degreein science..or maths..(ugh..maths)

coz the caller din reveal her intentions.
so she said..do u see urself workin out a career in music?
i said.
wan be singer songwriter lor.
coz she asked specifically.

so after a lot of "loss of words" from me
she say y n where she callin from..
offerin me a scholarship bla bla bla
but must pass interview 1st
and i think must complete ns 2 yr 1st

ask of my interest shd i really be offered this chance would i go for it
well
it sounds to me like its gonna be those kinda types where u are a professor bt no one knows hu u are..
u noe wad i mean?
writing the kinda music grace likes..
i mean..dun meanta discriminate,..
but classical music is thegrounding..
then u have to progress to music of TODAY..
not the DEAD..
haha


so i stressed to this doctor that i prefer POPular music..
not dead music at some coservatoire..

then she say..
but must have some GROUNDING ma
i wasn like..
ya..i have grounding liao
taught by my father wad no grounding..
oh
so she finally got the point that i have classical training..
of course i do la.
where got ppl so good all of a sudden one
i play since 5 ok.
(din say that of course)


so waitin for the interview.
shd be in a couple of weeks
but if i know that its gonna ba a dead end..
i rather not..

still rather stay around..
take part in more competitions..
till i can somehow "break thru."


hmm
thats a lot happeining.
sounds exciting?
not realy..at this time of the year
i dun really care about this.
jus wanna learn to control my chaotic emotions.
and get decent results.
and..
and.