what we say



Don't count on me





because
profile

joel
motorcycles. cars. lights. sounds. music. red. quiet."
because
Tagboard

because
runaways

iswan | von | cher | yawen | po | cc |
cal | jasper | jinlong | norvin | cbz | mx |
idhzuan | wanqing | huimin | otherside | eileen | marcus |
alex k | peng | cas | NDP | leonard soosay | ronin |
the sexies | electrico | soft | scs | link | link | link | link | link

archives

October 2005 | November 2005 | December 2005 | January 2006 | February 2006 | March 2006 | April 2006 | May 2006 | June 2006 | July 2006 | August 2006 | September 2006 | October 2006 | November 2006 | December 2006 | January 2007 | February 2007 | March 2007 | April 2007 | May 2007 | June 2007 | July 2007 | August 2007 | September 2007 | October 2007 | November 2007 | December 2007 | January 2008 | February 2008 | March 2008 | April 2008 | May 2008 | June 2008 | July 2008 | August 2008 | September 2008 | October 2008 | November 2008 | December 2008 | January 2009 | February 2009 | March 2009 | April 2009 | May 2009 | June 2009 | July 2009 | August 2009 | September 2009 | October 2009 | December 2009 | January 2010 |
because
Friday, June 30, 2006 @ 8:15:00 PM

mos with the guys
thanks ar cher for the so many vcds..
i think its 9
plus iswan 8th mile and dead alive
thanks iswan
plus the pianist from libraria..
12 moovies
haha
plus dvds..
nice..
thanks all..

gonna start asap
haha
sick of studyin..
think now is a better time to go sentosa than that day..
no exam liao..
hahaha

but nvm la

so nice the feeling after exam..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Thursday, June 29, 2006 @ 7:59:00 PM

todaay chem so tough
no time finish both paper sia
now if can pass good liao.

like tat i think paper 1 essay was easier compared to today the papers.

killer

tmr bio option topic.
shd be even more die.
i dun think i read more than 5 pages of that book b4.

had a really funny dream..
got class ppl inside.
last nite.
...
...

plans for the long weekend:

watch vcd till song.
go swimming.
long time din go.
bring my small brother go.
he dunno how to swim.
shd be fun.

haha
no mood for bio liao...

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Wednesday, June 28, 2006 @ 8:21:00 PM

haiz
my math duinno die till where liao.
dunno if can even get 9 marks after iswan tell me my argand wrong.
originally thought it would be 9 11 or 17

17 out liao coz of wrong prob.
now 11 also cannot.
9 too.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 @ 9:43:00 PM

I AM FINDING IT INCREASINGLY DIFFICULT TO ONLINE NOW!!!!
why i cant receive wireless???????

i dont online got th urge to online..
then cant do anything else but think of goin online..
HOOKED....
AAAAAAA...

today chem: think can paass..need only 45 marks rite?
i completed 5 qns..
one in scribbles..
3 blank. T.O.T.A.L.L.Y.
7 8 and 2
like..
wth
ORGANIC SO HARD!!!

haiz..
but 5 qns shd be 50 marks rite?
so minus 5 for some parts i din do..
haha
and mistakes..
shd be can pass ba..

to those hu cldnt manage..
dun be too sad...

it was super hard in my opinion..
organic esp..killer..

tmr math?
mr khoo gonna stand beside me AGAIN?
like he did for paper 1?
oh man..
i feel so bad..
he must feel real disappointed...

*u still come into the picture..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Monday, June 26, 2006 @ 7:38:00 PM

new odds..
dont play singapore poolss.
play with me..
haha

math marks BELOW 25: $0.50
math mark below 35:$3.50
math mark above 50: $50

who wanna play?

i think bio this time a bit better..
shd be can pass..

but din finish part b and c of 1 essay qn..
but at least can complete 1 quite properly..
though i keep forgettin transcription and translation..
mix up...
damn

and 2 ssructured blank..
as usual..the test cross qn..
plus the haem
qn..
all of a sudden forgot the ans..
wad the hell....

tmr chem..
so far untouched..
but dun wanna fail that...

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Sunday, June 25, 2006 @ 7:57:00 PM

ok..
good luck to all those who have studied..
all those like me..

jus try ur best..
and dun be too sad.
............................................

went to creative fair..
bought the $39 cam..

father say can share..
so din buy one for myself..

had fun playin with cam..
maybe now i can post some pix soon..
hahaha
-------------------------

last few hours..b4 exam
i feel like a liar
a cheat
a fraud
a fucked up bastard
i had the whole holiday to prepare
and i DIDNT

i acted that i prepare..
i acted that i got study..
and now im gonna FAIL

i gotta stop being a liar
a cheat
and one of so low morals as to deceive myself.
i feel bad..

target prelim 2.
i promise.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Saturday, June 24, 2006 @ 8:00:00 PM

visited grandparents..
mother side..

long time no see..
aunts all like shrivelling..
serious..
one of them arm cant stop twitching..

scary..
and poor thing..
take care all of u...

ask me about my studies..
how could i answer that qn?
told some lies.
very guilty for bluffing themm..

i dunnno wadd to do....

my laziness..
my parents..
my prelim 1..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Friday, June 23, 2006 @ 7:34:00 PM

think shd be goin to the creative sale in jurong..
shd be buying some stuff.

internet is sucky again.

cant believe that im actually blogging now..
in the past whenever teacher ask us write diary i always never hand in ..
coz very sian to write..
(primary school especially)

always end up playing soccer in the book..
u know by drawing 2 boxes at each end..
then markin 11 dots all over the place..
then u play by sliding a pen from one dot to the other:meant to be ur players..
best part was at the goal..
can defend the incoming shot by seeing if u can intersect ur friend's shot..
those were the days..
FUN

even tho so simple.
no worries.
even recalling hating my math teacher so much 3 of us boys gang up against her in p5..
when she go take new chalk..
we throw her handbag..
bang it..
pretend sneeze on it..

then kena the class goody-goody pang seh..
some more is a guy la..
guy tell on guy?
i mean if its girl more reasonable ma..
coz girls at that age mentally more mature..like dun wan make fun of ppl.. so will side the teacher..
but this..
GUY?

then go see discipline master lor..
threaten call parents..
then i say my parents overseas..
so call also no use..
last ditch resort..
that nite go home..
trembling..
hoping he wont call..
jie guo didn call..
but principal next day threaten expel all of us...

wah
then the other 2 put the blame on me..
FU
no morals lor..
wan stick toether also cant stand together..
mei you yi qi
anyway the VP a smart man..
could recognise their lies..
so didn punish me..
haha

talkin abt chalk anyway..
still remember the fun of chalk..
everytime sure volunteer go outside dust the duster into a metal-grilled wooden box to collect the chalk powder..
then the few of us would see who went home with the chalk-covered uniform..
LOL
even tried on teacher once..
lucky it was april fools..
and she laughed with us..

so fun..
not like now..
exam and exam and exam
and more notes to read.

no1 will believe..
but i shd be failing all 3 sub..
or maybe jus borderline one..

why cant i study anymore?

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Thursday, June 22, 2006 @ 7:40:00 PM

3 days b4 exams

went play bball..

then take new specs..

bio: left 40 %
chem: started only kinetics.
math:untouched.

i am seriously disappointed with myself..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Wednesday, June 21, 2006 @ 12:43:00 PM

bored
red
bode
rode
doe
ode
bed
rod

cant sit down to study

saw england draw with sweden yesterday.
england like quite useless ar?
like me.

im so free man.
so so free.

who want to bet that i fail prelim 1?
odds: chem $1.10
math $0.05
bio $1.80
gp $ 2.20

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Tuesday, June 20, 2006 @ 12:16:00 PM

yesterday eatin mcspicy chicken at mac..
told iswan y chicken taste funny..
guo ran is funny..
mornin stomach ache like siao..
i think if those no abs also if kena that stomachache also can have a 30kg dumbell thrown on them also no effect..
then came the landslide...

mcdonalds ar....

eat shit one..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Monday, June 19, 2006 @ 8:11:00 PM

woke up to go book seats in..
WRL
how cheesy..
not say book seats go world cup or some concert..
hahahaha
anyway asked is try to teach me some math..
so decided meet in lib to study..

anyway i din do much math..
only 3 chapt..
like..
got MILLIONS left..
coz i din haf mood do math..
MY BIO ONLY HALFWAY!!!
is keep wantin to check see hu online..
dunno lookin for hu..haha
jkjk

so introduced him to msn on handphone..
haha

+_+
feel like dying my brain..
went home 4 plus fell asleep immediately..
i think library env good for study tho..
must try for next exam..
coz no distractions..
thats a plus point.
at home..
i got tablet.
which means all my racing games and fighting games..
in lib
i FREEZE

so no distraction..
somemore its so painful to study in the lib as its so cold..
my body fats percaentage i think must be less than 3%..haha

yea..
actually i can accept failing agin..
but jus WORRIED this time if FAIL will CALL PARENTS..
i dun wan tat to happen!!

siannnnnn
gonna eat dinner..

transport in mammals..here i come..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Sunday, June 18, 2006 @ 7:36:00 PM

nothin much to update..
after sleep all the ideas vanished..

so

gonna try to study tonight

chem finished~0%
bio finished~50%
math finished~0%

i dun nid probability skills to tell me i will fail badly.
worst of all:
bio remembered~28%???

how???
DIE
but cant concentrate leh..

(if u are bored with the same things i say..
pls aviod my blog the next time.
thank u)

+ comment (0) | back to top?

@ 3:57:00 PM

jus came back
made myself happy today
went to malaysia
to spend money
bought shirt and some kinda bermuda?
earphones..
and a lot more stuff..

almost bought camera..
coz like quite cheap..
6 mpix like only 400Rm?
ya

but then didnt
coz remembered that i say i give half to my father.
so i dun haf much money to spend if its to last till the end of this year.

look at my watch..
one week left for study.
saw jasper blog.
to jasper: i am also very worried.. but i dont know what to do.. and i am also DOOMED for prelim..
saw yawen blog: same same.. dunno if it was lady luck on my side or not..
like damn TAI KOU
im like nowhere now..
like..
scoring the 7 points made me so lazy i guess.
what the FUCK am i doin about it then!!!
(saw cherling's blog..)

so ..
yes
im goin fail prelim 1.
sorry to all the teachers..
i kinda get the feelin when i see u all teachin that u r tryin very hard..
but i am just not listening..
or making ANY effort.

maybe i will start today.
bio..
tp be updated later..
very tired...

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Thursday, June 15, 2006 @ 9:35:00 PM

wanted to say a lot today..
but as i was just about to save the entry..
my wireless went off.

so just gonna say that i made new specs today..
changed my existin specs frame to purple..
coz it was broken in a futsal game with class guys..

and that i am quite happy to have wasted today as well.
cant wait for my new specs..

oh
went civic centre to buy guitar string..
saw idzhuan yizhen jessie..
many innovians seem to be studyin real hard at wrl man..
me?
**take care of urself.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

@ 9:10:00 PM


+ comment (0) | back to top?

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 @ 8:06:00 PM

boring day.
wanted to go out with work frens..then some cldnt make it..
anyway..
was thinkin..
maybe shd haf gone for class outin regardless of whether others are goin..

yea..
no reason to go..
but no reason NOT to go as well..
only makes ppl who are takin the pains to organise it feel bad.
sm how like equivalent to "dont give a damn" attitude.
sorry.

but the ONLY guy to go?

malaysia trip
say that u hate me..
no hope for studies le.
that might be the cure.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 @ 8:04:00 PM

dun need talk studies liao

most probably gonna fail again.

went out.
(forgot take my hp..no wonder pocket so light.)

no mood study.

no mood at all.

came back..

saw inbox got 3 msgs and some missed calls..
turns out that jer kwei asked me go watch movie..
i think the rest of the guys too.
weird.
jer kwei--movie?
at cinema?
impossible.

anyway he said it was cancelled coz no1 could make it.

so i went back out again.
riding around the neighbourhood.
donated 20 cent to some flag day girl who had the nerve to stop me on my bicycle.

shd be goin msia soon.

studies no hope liao.
as i said..
my heart is really nowhere to be found liao..
how can i put it in my studies?

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Monday, June 12, 2006 @ 7:44:00 PM

anyway
i am going to say the same thing again.
so skip forward if u still want to read.

i wasted the WHOLE day today.
mornin..
wake up
take newspaper
bring my brother cycling
go online
see yawen online
start to crap
very high
saw yvonne online
tried to crap
but internet failed me again.
so no choice.
mother and father not home..so
cooked 2 potatoes for lunch
ate some luncheon meat
ate an egg.
felt sleepy
went to sleep.
potatoes din cook fully i guess..
stomach felt weird.
fell asleep.
same old habit.

woke at 3
drink water
ryan ask me wan play bball..
i say ok.

he's movin away..
to kovan.
likely that we wont be playin together for a very long time.
kovan leh.

maybe nx wk b4 he moves gonna get the 4/6 of us to play a together match..
so long we 6 din play together liao
now gonna lose my bball buddy to kovan.
unless of course he willing to travel all the way here jus to play a game or too.
unlikely

yea
so hope to play one last time

so long din play liao
2 mths plus
i realised napfa gold means nth..
siao
cant even play half court w/o out of breath.

talked
catch up
realised sth in the process.
my heart is no longer in my studies...
my heart is everywhere else.
where it shdnt be at this pt of time.
suddenly i see the huge task b4 me.
but wad m i gonna do abt it?
will i do sth..or jus say or think about it only....

flash back a lot also
so conducive la the sky and the wind..
the park i noe for 6 yrs liao
plus
so many thins happen there.
doubt i will play there now after he move..
coz no one to play with.
but maybe will still play.
but with diff ppl.
weird
7 yrs pass so fast..
since i came here end of p5..

gotta end here.
jus feel the need to.
hope enough guys are goin to sentosa.
coz i feel like slacking.
but i think maybe 5 only..
or less.
if at all.
to jasper:hope ur condition is not serious..
damn sudden sia..

dunno how gonna salvage my studies.
*and i hope u always stay the same..
coz there's nth about u i wld change...

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Sunday, June 11, 2006 @ 11:40:00 AM

so yesterday was the competition..
and so the judge called the merits..and the 3rd prize..
nervewreckin..
we had to perform live u see..
i played a
"STEINWAY D MODEL CONCERT GRAND"
wow.
nice man..

then the mc said..
so there's two left..
would both of u pls stand up?
so noone stand up.
she ask again..
say either sure 1st /second liao..
ask us stand..
so she stand 1st then i stand.
then mc ask..
hu u think gonna b 1st?
then ask audience..
wan announce 1st or 2nd first ne?

so audience say:
second!!!

so she say..
second is...

student category:
TAN CHUN SENG JOEL.
2nd prize.
contestant no. IS-06.
yea.
so i lost to the VJ girl.
anyway the prize money is 2k

decided to give half to my father..
after all he is much responsible for my abilities in music today.
he was the one who taught me piano since 5.
and now guitar.
and believe me.
when i get my guitar done..
all those overgate players like ian shao xian edwin wont come close.
my father is a MUSICIAN.
teaches piano
guitar mainly..
in the past.

plays violin harmonica erhu flute/chinese flute pipe organ well
plus plus la.

so he has given me this gift of music.
God has blessed me.
half is not unreasonable.
anyway i dun need 2k at this time of my life..
now must STUDY!!!

end of year can go work ma

and write more songs.

made many frens..
take their contacts..
hope to work with them or learn more from them..
yesterday help one girl arrange a song she wrote..
so that now it sounds very much more emo and better.

haha
im lookin at a music industry job..
but tats impossible in singapore.
so thats y must study.
damn
less than 2 wks..
only read like 4 chpts of bio..
NOTHING ELSE STARTED YET!!!!
DIE SIA

anyway...

sentosa on tue..
lookin forward to it..

winner of the student final in instrumental category was clarissa.
stupid la.
dun understand her abstract perf..
all SCALES LA.


and DANIEL
j1 musicians club chair
also got 2nd..hahaha

so 2 2nds for innova..
ahahaha
RJ get merit only..hahaha
serve them right.

LOLOLOLOLOLOL

so shiok laugh at them.
pity the vj girl.
but i dun wan laff at girls.

she win me some more sia

who cares...

first sentosa...
then time to see what innova can do in studies too.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Friday, June 09, 2006 @ 5:00:00 PM

tmr comp day.
finals.
target:top 2
so that i can get some good money.

din study again.
realise now like already left so few days..
maybe day after tmr will try get back on track..
spent today finalising all the equipment details..wad we are provided all..
rehearsal time all..

damn sian

dun think my sound tmr will be so good.
combining rec with acoustic live is not a good idea the tech tell me.
anyway..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Thursday, June 08, 2006 @ 10:23:00 PM

scary morning
rode my bike to school
i think i was listenin to some song or wad..
din notice a car behind me..
it sideswiped me..

of course i fell
tore some skin on my right palm an elbow..
and arm.
lucky like tat only ar
sia la
dunno wad i was thinkin of also

then the canteen uncle from chinese stall was just comin out out of the side gate in his red car..
he wave at me..
i wave back..
and i jus got back on the bike only la..
with the blue car stopped ahead coz he had jus knocked me..
all in front of innova front gate..
no other witnesses.
dunno wad i was thinkin..
still can wave back..
then i turned into the side gate and went to park my bike.
leavin the blue car still there..
i think he drove off after a while.
din bother go general office to see if anyone waitin or sth.

damn sian.

stupid sia


cant believe that happened.

must thank God that i din turn earlier..
if not kena full-frontal blow.
then i probably wont be updatin this blog now.
now i think back..

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Wednesday, June 07, 2006 @ 9:54:00 PM

yesterday's post was a weird one..
and yesterday was a weird day too..
suddenly no one was "on" for the sentosa.
weird
i tot confirm on monday?

anyway so in no mood to study
coz like already set my mood for today.
to enjoy..
relax
slack
laugh
talk
joke

then nth happen

played hellotta guitar today..
fingertips pruned.

i still want to watch the omen.
im curious..
the nerve to make a movie on the antichrist..
and screen it on 6/6/6
so many movies made on christianity
exploiting the facts about the faith..

if its for some other religion..
say islam..
sure kena ban liao
can u imagine a movie like the da vinci code uncoverin some secret this time not about jesus christ..but about prophet mohammed or some islamic faith?
sure outrage liao.

so touchy today.
better not talk anymore.
kinda have this pent-up feelin inside.
dunno cause by wad.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Tuesday, June 06, 2006 @ 9:47:00 PM

slack day
couldnt be bothered to study
went out with work fren..
he want buy new soccer ball..
rain or else would have played..

i think i must follow vic liao
he min clock 6 hrs a day study
i should follow..
good example.
will benefit me also anyway..
must make an effort soon

interesting day yesterday..
guys went for bio lect..
like 20%of total cohort showed up..
azahar was like pleasantly amused.
said he wouldnt waste our time...
for once
after lunch at cwp kfc
managed to stay awake in bio
prob coz it was so stuffy..
and kept talkin to cal abt his race

funny thing happened
eric wong called
said p vp and he got letter informin that 2 innovians are in the finals of that national song/instrumental competition..
so they may be goin to see..
but he made a bad move of callin my home..
which made my parents think i was not in school.
if not y cant he contact me?
idiot sia

anyway not sure if goin for the finals too
but hope can
hope.

sentosa tmr
hope we have hot sun
strong breeze
azure skies streaked with white
and dazzling waters to swim/kayak in
sounds enjoyable.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Sunday, June 04, 2006 @ 10:22:00 PM

cycling day.
i enjoy outdoors.
math tmr gone case.
i want to watch omen and the nun.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Saturday, June 03, 2006 @ 8:26:00 PM

im such a waster of time...
can believe time is pang sehing me.
it seems like..
not gonna fight for what i cannot get..
not gonna try anymore..

i dun wanna be the cause of anyone's pain.
least of all yours.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Friday, June 02, 2006 @ 10:28:00 PM

actually..
it shd be no surprise that logan likes jean..
jus watched x men..
he hinted pretty clearly.

anyway..
startin to feel like harry potter..
my scar hurts..
(from the futsal game..)
right across my eyebrow..
wish it was longer tho..
then can look like some anime character..

stupid la
cause me so much trouble.

+ comment (0) | back to top?

@ 7:31:00 PM

had chem remedial today
realised how much i dont know..
will have to work on it

soon...

anyway..

played strt soccer with the guys..
some stupid oponent zam the ball into my face..
glasses broke..

fuckin stupid..
need to make new frame..
ex la u bastard..

ppl poor ok?

.......


anyway came to thinkin..
what if..
i mean..
like what if i had not played soccer..
would i still have my intact glasses?
shd be yes rite?

then like..
what if i had said hi to u..
we would have gotten to know each other..be frens rite..
then..
what if i had told u sth that i wanted to tell u instead of holdin back..

point:
time is like a web..
so many branches,..
so many uncertainties..
so many regrets...

+ comment (0) | back to top?

Thursday, June 01, 2006 @ 7:36:00 PM

cant believe im so lazy
left so much topics of organic to revise even though i had like 3 days to study
carry on like this i will fail my a level.

*let me be the tinman.
~wizard of oz..
tough..
heartless..
emotionless..
neutral..
dependable.

+ comment (0) | back to top?





I'm not listening.



Template by: decayedFairytale with the help of this and that